September 2010
Not the Smile
The things I miss most about you: your smirk, your words. But not your smile. That was never meant for me.
Directions
I was always better at directions, so maybe I just got here first?
Old Toys
I never get jealous when I see my you with someone else, because my parents always taught me to give my old toys to the less fortunate.
All Along
You knew who I was all along.
Census Report
I wish we were still the young, interracial couple renting a 3-bedroom home in a great neighborhood.
Hey Now
I still say I think more about you, but that might be because I think more than you in general.
Twelve
We only spent about 12 hours together, total. Now, that’s about how many times a day you appear in my thoughts.
Oh. That Time.
There was a time when you were everything I wanted.
Techno-Cheating
Sadly, I got used to the fact that you were more into your online game character than your real girlfriend. You were always playing with her while on the phone with me.
But After That?
You can’t come get your clothes from my apartment because I’m not done weeping in them.
Who? Who?
Who will make me SpaghettiOs? Who will send you texts you ignore?
Wiper
Rainy days make me miss the way you used to operate my windshield wipers for me. Can we please wipe away the past 5 months?
Solitaire Sleeping
Every time I fall asleep playing solitaire I wonder if you still do, too, and if you think of me.
Girl In Like
Your boyish charm always made me feel like a little girl in like. I just you’d been mature enough to make it more than that.
Too In Touch
Having snail mail as our only feasible means of communication would be great if we wanted to get over each other. Too bad neither of us want that to happen.
Fully Absorbed
I couldn’t eat, sleep or drink anything during the week you stayed at my house. That’s how much I was absorbed by you.
Not a Close Call
You called me from Kentucky. You called me from Las Vegas. But you never called me when you lived three blocks away.
Earfully
I thought only you could kiss my ear like that—thankfully, I was absolutely wrong.
Take Up Coffee
You’re still the first person I think of when I wake up.
Killer Show
It probably should’ve said something to me when our favorite show to watch together was about a serial killer.
Freudian Flip
Thank you for getting me to go to therapy. Fuck you for giving me so much to talk about.
Re-Break
Happy Birthday. I hope whoever’s heart you’re breaking this year is more resilient than mine was.
Gone Without Knowing
I miss you. I wish you knew that you were gone.
Brief Openings
I wonder if you notice those 48 hours when I unblock you on Facebook from time to time.
Stuffed Monkey
I never thought I could miss a stuffed monkey so much. Tell him I said “hi.”
No Exception
Nothing lasts forever, but I was hoping we’d be the exception.
Feelin' It
I’m not afraid I’ll never feel anything for anybody else. I’m afraid I’ll never stop feeling something for you.
Classic Manner
It started in such a classic manner, with “I’m freezing!” and, “Here, you can have my jacket.” Which lead to, “Let’s just share it!” Which lead to, “Let’s just exchange body heat!”
Smoking Teddy
I made my roommate hug my teddy bear, because he smells like cigarettes and pipe tobacco. I spent the next hour pretending it was your smell.
Until You Stop
I thought I could measure up to your ex, but I was wrong. No one will ever be able to until you stop loving her.
Replace-Face
But lying with him in bed that night, I looked up and saw your face where his should have been.
Already Everything
I tried so hard to be everything you could ever want, but I’m already everything he wants.
Angry Goldfish
You kissed like an angry goldfish and tasted like macaroni and cheese.
Cuddlewell
I’ve tried really hard to find someone who cuddles as well as you. So far, no one even comes close.
Cloudy
Someone told me the body changes chemically to please the first person you have sex with. That explains why my heart aches like cloudy memories of reformed drug addicts.
Booby Prize
Part of me sees your continued presence in my life as my prize for not being a crazy ex.
Changeable Plans
I have so many glorious overseas travel plans for the next couple years. Plans I would give up in an instant if you asked me to stay here, with you.
Big Bed
You loved me when all I had was a twin mattress on a cold wooden floor. Now I have a big, warm bed and no you.
A Real Show
If only you could have shown me in real life what you told the internet you felt.
A cyber-love-ghost posted a bunch of DOL notes back in time, on Sept 14th and 17th. Poke around if inclined or bored. Samples: “It seems fitting that you ran away with not only my heart, but my vintage Whitesnake T-shirt.” And: “Who else is going to think that my awkward dancing is adorable and not…well, awkward?”
But Don't
I like that you still email and text me randomly, but…don’t.
In to My Ex
Though you may never know it, you’re the inhale to my exhale, despite the 300 miles that separate us.
Confused
You ended up being such a pussy—I don’t know why mine confused you so much.
Significant
When asked to bring my “significant other” to a party, the only person I could think of was you. Yet you were never my official significant other. I went alone.
Not So Crazy
I’m crazy about him, I really am. So why am I still thinking about you?
Entire Days
When I hung out with you, it could never be for two hours like normal people. It was always entire days. I liked it like that. I miss that.
6.5
I was a kid at heart; you were an old soul. Opposites attract, but only for 6 and a half months.
Right Place, Wrong Time
You picked the perfect place for us to get married, but an imperfect time to show it to me.
As in Similar, Right?
When we met, you made me like you. When we broke up, you made me like you.
Not Sleeping
It’s 5am. Why aren’t I sleeping? Because I’m trying to find the perfect thing to say to you via the internet.
